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Author Topic: Dive bomb tactics
Hein Kill
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Member # 207

posted 10-06-1999 02:58 AM     Profile for Hein Kill   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Scheiße vot a katzenjammer Heiny has after his blitzkrieg on Manhattan...he took ze advice of EAW kamaraden und experienced many interesting bars...but it vas in ze 'Coffee Shop' bar on Union Square (vere zey serve not ze kaffe, strange no?) zat Heiny met his doom, zanks to ze evil fiendish US secret weapon, ze cocktail known as 'Divebomber'.

Ze following is vot Heiny wrote down on ze back of napkin, beside name of helpful Colombian waitress, Juanita McEveney. WARNING: zere is no way to counter ze effects of zis weapon, no evasive manoevre vil verk, ze blast radius is enormous und lasts for days...Scheiße!!


Ingredients:
1/3 oz Amaretto
2/3 oz Root beer schnapps
Fill with Beer

Serve in: Beer mug.

Mixing instructions:
Fill shot glass with 1/3 oz Amaretto and 2/3 oz root beer schnapps, next drop shot glass into mug of beer and drink before it fizzes over the mug.

If anyone else is having a good EAW cocktail recipe Heiny is glad to hear it...


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Enola Gay
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Member # 359

posted 10-06-1999 04:19 AM     Profile for Enola Gay   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Here's one my granpappy handed down to me, said he picked it up at the Savoy in London in the 40s...

Cherry Spitfire

2 oz Light rum (Bacardi)
2 oz Tequila
2 oz Peach schnapps
2 oz Triple sec
Grenadine
Top with 151 proof rum

Serve in and old-fashioned glass.

Mix ingredients and top with 151. If too strong add 7-UP or Sprite.

He said after the war he served it to some German pilots at a friendly meeting of former enemies and just like the real Spitfire, it knocked em cold.


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Hun-ter
unregistered

posted 10-06-1999 04:26 AM       Edit/Delete Post
Yay, first time I look at this forum and good to see some light hearted stuff not related to drivers, joysticks and patches! Here's one I call the P51, because unless you approach it right, you'll go down in flames!

1/2 oz Anisette
1/2 oz Vermouth
1 splash Bacardi 151 proof rum

Serve in a good thick shot glass (or it might explode...)

Mix into shot glass, and splash the Bacardi on the very top. Be careful not to mix it into the rest of the drink. Then carefully light the rum on fire with a match. Blow out the flame and drink it fast before the rim gets too hot. This is the skill, do it wrong and you'll either be drinking fire, or wearing it!

The Hunter


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KrashnBurn
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Member # 21

posted 10-06-1999 04:33 AM     Profile for KrashnBurn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Never mind all these fancy pantsy cocktails with weird foreign ingredients, I got a real classy one, guaranteed to make you feel blitzed. I call it the Carpet Bomb:

Ingredient: Beer, can, one of.
Accessory: Ballpoint pen, screwdriver or similar
Technique: Punch a hole near the base of the can, place mouth over hole, open tab on top of can, guzzle beer as it gushes out of can.
How hard is that? That sound you hear is the carpet rising up to smack your face

Krash

PS Good to see you made it back alive Hein, been quiet round here. Didn't see Fifi while you were over there did ya, she seems to have gone AWOL too


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Niedzwiecki
unregistered

posted 10-06-1999 05:47 AM       Edit/Delete Post
Hah, we have a similar simple cocktail we call atomic bomb:

Is 1/2 l Aquavit, 2 dl Beer

Just fill a small glass with beer and put in a pint glass. Fill pint with Aquavit. All other bomb recipes (B52 for example) are the other way around which is boring.

Cheers,

Niedzwiecki


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CFrancisco
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posted 10-06-1999 06:12 AM     Profile for CFrancisco   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
HAHAHA heiny you shouldve called me i would have shown you more of the glories oF NYC!!!

and we call that drink DR PEPs or DR. PEPPERS but my fav terminology is the DEPTH CHARGE!!

zo herr kein kill du nicht go to Argentina but to ze Americas hhhmmmm mustve been zere for ze Gestapho no?


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Fifi Maraudiere
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posted 10-06-1999 06:59 AM     Profile for Fifi Maraudiere   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Bah! It is crass this calling of beer drinks to be cocktails. Cieux! The only cocktail Fifi will drink is one in which the ingrediént principal is Bollinger champagne.

Fifi just loves the sound of the corks popping (pop pop pop)

...excusé mon general...Fifi's buttons seem to 'ave landed in your champagne flute...you know you really should use a real champagne glass, they were modelled by Napoleon on the anatomié of Josephine...('oo admittedly was more petite than Fifi)


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Hein Kill
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Member # 207

posted 10-06-1999 07:19 AM     Profile for Hein Kill   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Ah Fifi, my wenig tauchte...I thought perhaps ze evil Amerikaner had 'grounded you', zo to speak.

Since you are liking the Champagne, perhaps you would be liking this sign which the well travelled Hein Kill saw at a hotel in Chicago:

"Special champagne cocktails for the ladies with nuts".


hahahahaha (plink) ... no madame zat is not an olive, zat is Heiny's lovely green eyeball...please to take it out of your martini glass...or, uh, you could put it zere, if you prefer, of course...(blush)

P.S. In his travels Heiny has also seen ze following mystisk signs...of which he is a keen collector, so please to add to this personal list.

In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read this.

In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.

In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.

In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

In a Hong Kong supermarket: For your convenience, we recommend courageous, efficient self-service.

Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

Outside a Paris dress shop: Dresses for street walking.

In a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.

In a Vienna hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.

Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan: Stop: Drive Sideways.

In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.

From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.


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CFrancisco
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posted 10-06-1999 07:37 AM     Profile for CFrancisco   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
HAHAHAHA ZAT IST FUNNY!!

I am Rollingenonzeflorenlaughingenmeinearseoffen

ROLF for short.. LOL


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Enola Gay
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posted 10-06-1999 08:22 AM     Profile for Enola Gay   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
ROLFMAO I saw this one on the door of a restaurant in Vietnam...

"Please wipe the shoes with backside before entering"

I think they meant 'wipe the underneath' of the shoes? But hey, I can't laugh, every time I tried to buy bananas in Vietnam I got fish.

E.G.

[This message has been edited by Enola Gay (edited 10-06-1999).]


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Enola Gay
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posted 10-06-1999 08:25 AM     Profile for Enola Gay   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Uh, should say in advance this is not meant to imply I was a vet (misconception whenever I mention Nam on a forum). I went there on holiday in '94.
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KrashnBurn
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Member # 21

posted 10-06-1999 08:46 AM     Profile for KrashnBurn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
A couple for your collection Heiny, can't claim them personally but sent to me by a buddy...

Brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo - When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Two signs from the same Majorcan shop entrance ...
- English well talking.
- Here speeching American.

I guess American and English are different languages

Krash


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KrashnBurn
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Member # 21

posted 10-06-1999 09:07 AM     Profile for KrashnBurn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
By the way, have been doing a little flatfoot style analysis on previous H.Kill posts and can present the following conclusions:

- has green eye(s) (he let that drop today)
- is at least on intimate terms with Fifi M, if not a cross dresser himself
- travels a lot (so I doubt he is 93 as his profile states)
- has an inexhaustible supply of jokes
- dubious command of German, but may own a German dictionary so nationality unkown
- flies only bombers (which only adds to the final conclusion) that...
- he's certifiably mad

...and I mean that in the nicest possible way, Herr Kill

Krash

[This message has been edited by KrashnBurn (edited 10-06-1999).]


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Niedzwiecki
unregistered

posted 10-06-1999 09:29 AM       Edit/Delete Post
I'm back, this is not quite on-topic (what is? this started as a thread on cocktails didn't it?) but someone just told me this one and I laughed:

Question: What separates flight attendants from the scum of the earth?

Answer: The cockpit door.

Tee hee



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Chris392
unregistered

posted 10-06-1999 09:44 AM       Edit/Delete Post
I don't usually buy into these joke threads but I couldn't resist because I heard this from the purser on a Continental flight on the weekend as I flew home:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until the aircraft has come to a complete stop. We don't want you arriving at the gate before the plane does."

(It's my opinion that "Please remain seated until the airplane has arrived at the gate" are the 11 most ignored words in the English language.)

Chris


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CFrancisco
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posted 10-06-1999 09:45 AM     Profile for CFrancisco   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Hey Krash,

Coming from NYC i can definitely say that English and American are totally different languages YO! soz wat yuz sayin HUH dat our english aint PHAT y u dissin our english like dat? ...


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Donster
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Member # 196

posted 10-06-1999 12:30 PM     Profile for Donster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Hein Kill,

I have a question for you. Since you seem to be intimate with Miss Fifi, have you on your last trip to Berlin picked up one of those new Wonderbras called Stopemfromfloppin? She would probably appreciate one on those high Flak concentration raids over Schweinfurt!
Maybe get one for her tail gunner too!

Donster


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Fifi Maraudiere
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Member # 23

posted 10-06-1999 07:39 PM     Profile for Fifi Maraudiere   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
It is not to dignify, such an aspersion!

Fifi is not needing of any such apparat. Fifi 'as 'er own structure, as upstanding as the Eiffel Tower and there is not a man alive can say the other. In fact there are quite a few 'oo 'ave 'ad more than an 'eiffel', if you get Fifi's meaning.

Ooooh such sexismé, it makes Fifi so...over excitable (pop pop pop)

...no Bridgette, let us just leave, the smell of our perfume, and their scorched egos, the only sign we were even 'ere...

[This message has been edited by Fifi Maraudiere (edited 10-06-1999).]


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Donster
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posted 10-06-1999 09:55 PM     Profile for Donster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
My most sincere apology to you Miss Fifi! Maybe some day we will meet in the skies over your beautiful french country side, and not only will I escort you safely to the target, but I will see you home too! Me in my P-38 and you in your B-26, we will make France free once again! Then when our work is done, we could meet in Paris and have a victory toast of champagne!And maybe you could bring along Miss Bridgette and we could have one of those how you french say menage a trois? Believe me I don't have the leaning tower of Pisa, if you catch my drift.

The Donster


Posts: 10794 | From: Cedar Rapids, Iowa USA | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
Fifi Maraudiere
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Member # 23

posted 10-07-1999 04:01 PM     Profile for Fifi Maraudiere   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
M. Donk.

The only menagé a tróis that you are ever likely to enjoy, mon chér, is yourself, your hairy fist and a jar of animal fat...

...no Bridgitte he is NOT cute...oh you are so, uncontrollable...mon dieu save me from blondes...


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Donster
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Member # 196

posted 10-07-1999 08:25 PM     Profile for Donster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
OUCH! That really hurt. But you know what they say, Gentlemen do prefer Blondes!
So how about it Miss Bridgette? You, me, a bottle of champers and that jar of animal fat? Maybe we can get Herr Von Hess to take out Miss Fifi for 4-5 hours? Or maybe Hein Kill? I have lots of Hershey bars and cigarettes for you! xoxoxo

The Donster



Posts: 10794 | From: Cedar Rapids, Iowa USA | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
Puttfarken
unregistered

posted 10-08-1999 12:45 AM       Edit/Delete Post
HERR DONSTER !!!

I had ze opportunity to escort Mme. Maraudiere and ze Brigette vonce in my Me 410 (Zey were about ze last Flugzeug left from ze flight vitch we decimated)-

I hereby claim my prior right to:
1. Shoot down ze B26 in flames
2. Take ze madame und her nokeepenplaneroffbackenflieger as guests to our flugplatz, und shoot ze both of zem down in flames again

Zo there- Paris vill haf to wait, nein??

Vatch sechs

Major Dietrich Puttfarken
II./KG 51"Edelweiss"
Schipol, Holland


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CFrancisco
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posted 10-08-1999 06:32 AM     Profile for CFrancisco   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
VAS!! take out HERR Hein kill for 4-5 hours ?.. vat do you zink i am a fleigerofdersechtsenofaduden .. ACH HIMMEL!! NEIN MEIN GOTT!! zis stuka flieger likes der fraulines... LOL.. scheiss ich habes to stop wearing zis scarf und purple jacket zat ze fat man gave me...MEIN GOTT! i knew it..i knew it und Herr Riechmarschall told me ze mascara vas to keep ze sun glare from his augen!! HA!
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Donster
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Member # 196

posted 10-08-1999 10:07 AM     Profile for Donster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
No Herr Von Hess! You or Hein Kill take out Miss Fifi for 4-5 hours! Jeeze man! Where is your mind at, the Officers Club? Maybe to many dips in the Channel? That's the ENGLISH CHANNEL, not the rear channel, if you catch my drift!

The Donster
Graduate, Abnormal State University


Posts: 10794 | From: Cedar Rapids, Iowa USA | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
CFrancisco
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posted 10-08-1999 10:24 AM     Profile for CFrancisco   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
OH now i see!! hahahaha

Long standing Fraternity Brother of
TAPPA KEGGA BREW-TKB NYC uppereast side charter =)


Posts: 4364 | From: NYC, NY | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
Donster
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Member # 196

posted 10-08-1999 12:18 PM     Profile for Donster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Of course here in the great midwest our Frat was Tappa Kegga Blue ( For Pabst Blue Ribbon).
Shows how old I am!

Our favorite concoction in high school was this:

1. One 30 gallon garbage can. ( clean if possible)

2. 1 Half gallon of just about everything you can imagine in the liquor store. (usually a total mix of 25 or so total gallons of different stuff,IE:Whiskey, Vodka, Everkleer,etc.)

3. One boat oar for stirring.

4. At least 1 keg of Beer for chaser.

The (Hiccup!) Donster


Posts: 10794 | From: Cedar Rapids, Iowa USA | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
CFrancisco
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Member # 33

posted 10-08-1999 12:24 PM     Profile for CFrancisco   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU MIXING!!! JP 4!!!

holy cripeies!! thats gotta be hazardous to your help


Posts: 4364 | From: NYC, NY | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
Donster
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Member # 196

posted 10-08-1999 02:37 PM     Profile for Donster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
Naw, we used JP4 for sauce on our ice cream!
:^)


The Donster


Posts: 10794 | From: Cedar Rapids, Iowa USA | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
CFrancisco
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Member # 33

posted 10-08-1999 02:54 PM     Profile for CFrancisco   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
DOH!! i meant to say health... hahah even reading about it fried my brain..LOL
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Tailspin
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posted 10-08-1999 05:54 PM     Profile for Tailspin   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post
We used to hang out at the local roadside inn between classes at JUCO. A popular drink was the Freddyfutbucker. Tequila and OJ with Galiano added. :^P When you could not pronounce the name of the drink correctly...the bartender cut you off!!!

[This message has been edited by Tailspin (edited 10-08-1999).]


Posts: 1895 | From: Metropolis USA | Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged

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